Pissed.

And this time i'm not really in the mood to apologise. I didnt start it.

Indeed, i might not understand the magnitude of ur anger towards them but i seriously doubt there is a need for it to stay pissed for so long.

Coming from a place where my relationship w relatives r a bit strained, i really dont want things to degrade further just cos of that incident.

"I dont like her" jus dont cut it.

Instead of being so pissed (still), why cant u jus be cordial? Nobody is asking u to hold her hands and prance around. To me, its pettiness and ur just stuck in ur own world. She is, after all still ur relative and she has taken more shit from u than whatever she gave u that day.

Have you thought of the complications that i'll have? Having to explain ur behaviour? I hate being stuck in the middle.. but i guess its all about u?

Dunno la... i already know what ur retorts will be like... to me, it cannot justify how u reacted today. Today just didnt make sense.

Fuck it la.. i'm just tired of trying to salvage the situation all the time. Trying to make things better. Trying to make u not seem like the bad tempered guy. Trying to let everyone see u the way i do.

Wahaha.. Did the lastest face recognition thingy just for kicks... And guess who i look like?!

*drumrolls*

(was so afraid i look like some guy... lol)


TADAH!

I bear a 68% resemblance to Liv Tyler & Alexis Bledel! *gasp*

I ish pretty! hahah..

And a 64% resemblance to Sammi.. lol.. Dear says i have an ah lian face =/

Put in another photo and got a shock... lol.. Brace urselves..

I bear a 71% resemblance to..............

KATE BECKINSALE!

FWAH... lol.. *unworthy*

*happy*

Decisions. Decisions. Decisions.

Dear is now at a crossroad in life.. a fairly important one actually. To study overseas or not.

Lotsa friends asked me this before.. If ur other half go study overseas, u how? laughs.. I also dunno actually. Been thinking about it for such a long time.

Its definitely not in my nature to stop him from going so yes, i'm encouraging pushing him to go for it. And there's no buts.. I dont want/like to be in the way of something that can really bring about a big change to his life (and maybe ours?)

If he's doing law, he'll be gone for 5 yrs? Thats almost as long as we have been together.. lol.. His reasons for not wanting to go is that we wont be around (or rather he wont be around) to accompany each other thru the crucial/momentous stages of our lives.

-Like me moving to my new hse next yr.. he cant help w the renovations, moving, choosing tvs, beds, linen..
-Wont be around to celebrate my 22nd to perhaps 26th birthdays n his 23rd to 28th (?) birthdays..
-Wont be around when i get my first job, first paycheck..
-And we definitely cant get engaged/married next year.. lol..

Actually i feel e same way too....... Deep deep deep deep inside it would really suck if he goes away.. Like deep heart wrenching pain.. Jus thinking bout sending him off kills me.. lol

And there is this eventuality that we might not even survive this long distance thing. Its a fact, whether we like it or not. Being apart for so long honestly doesnt help a relationship. lol..

But i jus really really want him to go cos its good for him. Period.

He has a chance to do what he wants. Like me, he's been just cruising through life (i still am) and its good that he finally has the drive to do what he wants.

On the other hand, it maybe good if he does go overseas.. cos i can then take the easier way out and be an air stewardess. lol.. It be cool to live the jet set lifestyle.. See the world (in between flights.. lol)..

Hiya.. dunno bah.. another meaningless post. Guess its really not a decision thing since there is nothing to decide afterall. I'm jus troubled.. no... perplexed.

Go bah dear.. Go be somewhere else besides this suffocating town.

And i'll be here waiting =)

Just buy LV/ Dior/ diamonds for me when u become a hotshot lawyer! ^^

Been so sick for the past 3 days =/

When everyone was enjoying their deep slumber or the Arsenal Real Madrid match.. i was running in and out of the toilet from 12 to 7+... puking n diarrhoea-ing... Was so tired of running to the toilet, i slept on the couch outside(nearest to the damn toilet), even comtemplated nodding off in the toilet itself... =(

It was so bad man.. Was dehydrated and tired as hell.. I seriously hate to puke.. all the bits of food and stomach acid will go up ur nose n be stuck there... Yucks.. Disgusting.

Dear brought me to e doctor first thing in e morning. Why does the doctor only come in at 820 when the clinic opens at 8?! Grrr.. its bad karma to let sick people wait u know =/

Anyway, i got a jab and bunch of meds (which is finishing) and ate crap tasteless food since. Except when dear cooked my porridge yesterday.. nice... =) Yesterday his family had birthday celebrations and there was CRABS! i couldnt go cos i was running a fever.. They da bao-ed a whole crab back for dear... my saliva glands were in overdrive as i watched him eat the pepper crab. AHHH.... THE AGONY...

I have cravings for soo many damn things! Pepper Crabs, Nissin Chilli Crab Cup Noodles, Brownies, Ice cream, Fruits, Ba Chor Mee, Fried chicken wings.... etc... I jus want tasty food!

Boohooo.... Might go back to see the doctor again cos i dont seem to be getting well... hiaz.. Damn u lousy stomach!

I cant wait for "So you think you can dance?" on channel 5 on 20th March!

Makes me feel like putting my dancing sneakers on! Heehee... Wish i could have pursued a career as a professional dancer >.<

But of course.. the singapore system REALLY allows us to pursue our dreams. *jealous*

And people, please please watch American Dad on thursday 12 midnight on channel 5! Its like fucking funny and its better than simpsons! Parodies of many stuff worldwide! Dick Cheney, terrorism.. muahaha.. Hilarious i tell u...

[i think channel 5 should endorse me! I'm such a tv addict..]

--------------
Random Rants:

From now on i'd be studying studying studying! Accounts.... yucks.. Must encourage me ok everyone? If not i'll slack off after a while de =/ Hope i can do well... And that my brother can get me internship at GIC..

Plus my phone is spoilt! Cant hear anything when people call.. and smtimes it auto blanks out or the screen becomes all fuzzy de. So everytime people call, i gotta reject their call then call back! Irritating. This phone jus slightly more than 1 yr old only so fast spoil le..

Not sure if i should repair or change phone tho... Hopefully it stays ok when i bring it for trade in when e guy is checking it.. haha..Wanna get a cheap flip phone. Perhaps razor v3? But i dont really like e pink leh.. Then i go and zhng myself like xx.. haha..

Any suggestions anyone?

And i feel like eating Brazil (topside!) and getting a massage~! *bliss*