Life is perfect when...



















you get a piggyback ride from the love of your life, along a quiet street at 2 in the morning.. laughs..

Been feeling like crap lately.. stupid hormones.. Been thinking & thinking about my life, what i'm doing with it, how its going to turn out & i find myself worried bout my achievements (or rather the lack of it) and how funky my future will become..

BUT..

as cliche as it is, worrying doesnt get anyone anywhere. You just keep stomping about at the same spot. It dawned upon me that i shouldnt really have much to worry about... either that is the hormones clearing up.. lol..

Although i dont have a happy family like last time, at least they gave me all they could even when i didnt show them the respect that they should get. I still have a mom and a brother that loves me (a lil suspicious of my dad), and I absolutely love them. w00t! lol.. Not mentioning dear too.. he's everything that i'm not & i'm really very happy being w him, though some of his shortcomings pisses the hell(!) out of me. lol.. Being together for 5+ yrs has helped me grow as a person & i'm not longer that needy, jealous little kid =P

School lately has been bothering the crap out of me.. and i guess the main reason why i'm so worried bout not 'making it' is cos i'm so goddamn lazy! lol.. really.. Procrastination is my middle name. But i've decided that i shant sit on my ass anymore & actually get started with my notes! Hopefully i'll have all my notes done by the end of the year..

As for myself, i'm going to stop thinking bout other people's actions and let it affect me, cos there's really no point eh? They have their lives, and i have mine. I'm happy & cherish the relationships i hold with those dear to me.. That's whats most important.. I should stop being an insecure little bitch. lol.. Admist the rain, i know there will always be someone there to hold my hand *smiles*

*yawnz* tired tired, school tmr... but i shant groan bout it ^^ Gotta do quite a few stuff.. laundry, collect notes, copy notes, buy wrapping paper.. On a totally irrelevant note, I finally ate UNAGI @ Sakae that day!! wee... they dont have it on the sushi but they got it in a handroll!! Yummy.. turns out they couldnt find a supplier -_- I think i ate bout 7 unagi handrolls? heh.. Aight.. Nightz!

Melancholic Me

Feeling so frustrated, depressed, restless.. even sad. Perhaps It is THAT time of the month. Been doing a lot of thinking/worrying bout my school & myself.

School- Its so depressing that i once i start thinking bout it, i really get so worried that i cant even sleep. Damn accounts... i hate accounts. Truth be told, i havent been attending ANY lectures at all. Dont wanna end up failing my finals, cos its like super expensive to fail any modules & i think it pushes my graduation back by a year. Hoping i can get 2nd-upper honours. 1st-class honours is a lil out of my league =P But i must definitely stop procrastinating & actually get some work done.

Myself- Not sure why but i'm one who get influenced by others super easily. So much so that what they do or say affects me to such an extend that i feel compelled to do something bout it, as if i've got smthing to prove. Whats weird is i'm only affected by some only & its sometimes about the minor-est of things.. Hiaz. Don't know what is wrong with me. I should seriously stop. Trying but..............................

I think i'm going nuts. Hopefully the trip out will clear my head. Definitely not my stomach tho, cos we're going for Sakae! (yes.. again) Hopefully they have Unagi.

The night i forgot

Hmm.. where do i begin? I'll never forget that faithful night at DblO, when i got totally wasted & Merlion-ed everywhere. 5th Nov. *shudders*

We had a blast, at first.. laughing, talking rubbish & taking all sorts of pics. We sat by the table, from 9 to 12 drinking non-stop.. tequila, gin & tonic, Vodka lime, vodka redbull, bacardi.... Everything came quickly, and we all just chugged all of them down like no tomorrow. No idea why we were in such a 'hurry' too. The last thing i remember was heading down to the dancefloor w Keng and returning back to the table in a while to down more tequila. Everything else was a blank. The next conscious moment was next morning, when i woke up in bed beside dear.. There was once tiny instance tat i did remember tho... i was lying in bed, puking.. with water alcohol flowing out of my mouth with dear talking to me (angrily?)...

sigh... First time in my life i got so wasted.. and i'm not proud bout it. Where was my self-control? How scary is it for a girl to not remember anything bout the night before? If not for my dear, so many terrible things could have happened to me. I think i lost some self-respect for myself that night. Plus, my stomach felt so horrible afterwards.. no hangover.. but my stomach was so bad that i puked out the med tat was suppose to sooth my nausea.

I feel so grateful to him. He had to singlehandly drag my drunk, non-cooperative ass back (no idea how he managed to drag me down that huge flight of stairs), while trying to make sure that my puke dont end up everywhere. He also cleaned up all my puke in the room & on me for 2 whole hours, even though he wasnt very sober himself.

the following segment is mushy.. pls stop reading if u are sensitive to such material. ^^


Thank you so much dear.. Thank you for taking care of me & making sure i was ok. *hugs* I love u =) *kisses*

Well, I've vowed to not touch alcohol in a long long long longggg time.. Just thinking of all the spirits makes me gag. I dunno how limbueytor can do this kind of drinking almost everyday. =P

GRRRR....

feeling damn frustrated but i dont even know where to begin. Just feel so helpless as i see him slipping away, further n further from me.. becoming someone who i cant even recognise.. ARGH.. why are those higher ranked people always so fucked up? I really wish i could do something like scream at them n ask them to bugger off.. or maybe even kill them..... We are really wasting resources keeping those imbeciles in service....

Cant they see what they are doing? Do those morons even know how it feels like? Do they really want to know how it feel like to push someone off the edge?

Hating everything around me right now.. I hate them, the fcking Sirs n Mdms... I hate the whole bloody system. I just wanna shoot those muthafckers, especially those weasels, who have totally no qualms bout stepping on others to get what they wants. I dont understand why such people can actually get away with murder.. while the rest of us gotta clean up their shit. Must we stoop down to their level to see that justice is served?

Dunno wat to do or say to help the situation.. Keeping quiet also isnt any better.. Frustrated, helpless, angry.......... Am i suppose to sit there n just pray that everything will get better eventually.. perhaps try my best to not make the situation look so bad... All i can do perhaps is to walk down this angry journey with him, to let him know he isnt alone.... and maybe try my best to keep my anger & helplessness under wraps...

*sighhhhhh..*

Family Day!

Since yesterday was Deepavali, his family decided to have a picnic! I love picnics.. laughs.. So at an ungodly hour of 8 am, we all headed out for Labrador Park near PSA. Beautiful place.. a park by e sea.. There were lotsa fishermen too! We got the "hut" nearest to the sea so there were salty sea breezes too.. lol.. Could definitely get used to that place. Downside - there were tons of ants everywhere! Especially after someone spilled some Pepsi on the floor. Yucks..

After eating breakfast, his grandma (whom i adore.. lol) jio me to play frisbee with her! haha.. Soon, everyone joined in.. xw brought her bf to the picnic.. Tried my best to include him cos i know how it feels like to join such a big family for e first time. Laughs.. Remembered I was pretty scared then.. Prolly cos i was only 16 then? And he ran off to play soccer, leaving me alone.. lol.. But at least now, i've formed a pretty good relationship with his family and they accepted me, for the brown haired, cant-speak-teochew me. And for that i'm very glad. =)

The boys were playing soccer, didnt join in cos the "pitch" was already very small.. so i, xw dragged his youngest aunt to take photos.. lol.. It was way too sunny to take much decent photos cos we were squinting all e time..

best shot:




















xw (left) & me.. The background very nice right? Saw a fisherman catch a fish.. lol.. thought it was pretty big from the bend of the pole but.. lol.. i was quite wrong. I would love to go fishing tho, just standing there watching e world go by & i think it'd be quite thrilling to catch a fish!

We were getting a lil bored so i came up with an idea for a photo.. lol.. To take a photo while jumping off a platform.. LOL.. quite funny.. End result:





















Hahaha.. Like some happy cereal advertisement. I jumped very high hor.. ahaha.. quite an experience.. was quite afraid that i might land wrong tho..

Stayed at the park till bout noon when it was getting hot.. I got sunburnt =P didnt think of putting any sunblock.. but i quite like the effect.. haha.. all nice n pinky at first but when night came, i looked like a lobster.. lol.. After packing up n getting rid of all e ants on the bags, we headed to his grandparent's place.. Played mahjong (with tai) & ended up winning $57!! Not too shabby eh? lol.. but had to give $30 to his aunt cos she was my finance minister so had to share my profits.. $27 still not too bad la hor..

Ended e day totally shagged, cos only slept 3 hrs e night before & got 6 hrs of slp for school today.. HRM.. so booorrriinngg... almost nodded off.. skipped a test too.. =P

Heading to dblo this saturday! Cant wait for get some tequila! w00t!

The Day We Ate a Cow

Yesterday, together with Alex & Nicole, we went for dinner at Brazil Caracacha Churrascaria! This time round, instead of stuffing myself with everything that came to the table, i did selective eating and ended up stuffing myself with topside, lamb & pineapples! If we added up all e meat we ate, i think it would amount to an entire cow =P The onions at the salad bar were really nice too.. lol.. like those at Phuket ^^

Since the night was young & the restaurant was almost closing, we decided to head to Corduroy & Finch around e corner to chill for a while.. I absolutely love the concept of that place and the utensils they use! laughs.. Perhaps i should adopt some of its ideas for my mom's new place..

Speaking of my mom, Happy Belated Birthday mom! =) tho there's no chance in hell u would read this, just wanna let u know that i LOVE u... *kisses*

Tried this drink that doesnt sound right at all.. Absolute milkshake.. Vanilla milkshake + Absolute vanilla. That 2 just dont really seem to match.. lol.. but it turn out like a normal milkshake.. couldnt really taste any vodka (hence feeling a lil ripped off.. laughs). Also tried a really nutty chocolate cake.. which tasted pretty good.... Small.. but pretty good =)

Didnt take much photos, in fear of insulting Alex's camera.. lol..

Didnt wanna end up going back too late cos we've got a family picnic early in e morning.. so left before midnight.. Ended up slping at 4am instead.. zzzz... Hence explaining my fatigue now..